the plums were delicious

why is it that almost every drummer I meet seems to have
terrible
social
anxiety?
To where I just want to give them a hug,
but that would probably scare them more.
So I bring up Neil Peart.
For some reason that seems to solve the problem.
Cool



-Hayley

uh ohs pskettios

I'm addicted to chamomile.









-hayley

happy birthday to me.

it says "19" on my last.fm now. weird.




-hayley

a double helix electric kool-aid ice cube

I like the way you fly.

portishead-strangers








-hayley
p.s. if you put sequins in the ocean does that make them seaquins?

dustings of powder blue waves before they catch the light

sometimes we miss things.




the black ghosts-full moon






-hayley
p.s. let's stargaze at our shoes and shoegaze at the stars.

spending another weekend in the city...

mattles ish angwy
rar rar rar

goodbye new jersey
hello mini vacation
yes I'm from new jersey
yes my vacations mean lots of walking and little sleep
and I wouldn't have it any other way
I'm getting so good at this personal thing.



-hayley
p.s. double bubbles melt all troubles.

I'm so bright I make chrome look like sandpaper

...
(click picture to enlarge)



motivation station.

so I'd like to try and start making this blog thing more personal because I feel like it's gotten to the point where the 2.4 people who read this are on the way to the conclusion that I am either a robot or the overlooked third wheel in somebody's multiple personality disorder. I want to start including more personal (and by personal I mean "real" or something..) things in here...so I'm starting with school stuff yay. here's how I start every english assignment. does it matter though? I have an A.






-hayley

sweet nothings

all of your opinions are wrong

lalalala

hatehatehate





-hayley

little specks of magic

porcupine tree-drawing the line


porcupine tree-the incident

just listen fools!


-hayley

p.s. we should go boating together. in a boat.

let the games resume

I am happy, fresh, and so incredibly free.

and maybe it took doing sambuca shots with drag queens to realize that.



it's ok though because I really know it now.





p.s. I'm not much of a coffee person.

your front porch

...Is my back yard.



and I am going to color all over it.






-hayley









p.s. seeing a good film should be free.

I Found Stairs in my Attic

right-side out but still overturned I can
feel the inside of my outside pulling me back again
and I feel like if I were to ever doubt this thing
it would have been the sundae
to a three star meal's end

I can't understand why we come so far
before we realize how little we came
and it's sort of sweet how it's gotten
so bad but really it's just another shame

but it's all gripping pulling and over exhausting
itself to the point where it's...
and it's all pushing shoving and waiting itself
out to the point where it's...
still it's all reaching swinging and ever so inclined
to end up at the point where it's...
right back to where it all started

how do we turn ourselves inside out when any side we're on feels so wrong?
do the things we're doing come back around again and where do we go
before they're gone?

we've been closed for so long that when we open up I have
to ask 'where did everything go?'
and stand apart looking up to see what will happen oh
well, I guess, we really don't know

oh well, what do we do I...
well, where do we go from...
I...
well oh well I, oh, I don't know

but it's all gripping pulling and over exhausting
itself to the point where it's...
and it's all pushing shoving and waiting itself
out to the point where it's...
still it's all reaching swinging and ever so inclined
to end up at the point where it's...
right back to where it all started

oh well, what do we do I...
well, where do we go from...
I...
well oh well I, oh, I don't know









-hayley

so let them eat (sprinkle-induced and super fat) cake

Fuck.





fucking dammit!



Do you ever have a situation where you have a gut feeling that it's going to just get fucked over but you keep letting it drag on and then it DOES GET FUCKED UP?


...and your just like



fuck.

I could have/should have/did see that coming..


but you didn't do anything about it because you so badly didn't want it to get ruined..


so you sort of didn't let yourself get your hopes up but at the same time tried to ignore the possibility of it getting ruined...




and then it does get ruined.



and it's just...









such a shame.

CRIKEY I could go for some fish n' chips!

So I woke up this morning with My Bloody Valentine's Loomer stuck in my head, which I didn't mind at all being it's such a good song. And sometimes when I have a song stuck in my head (and when I'm bored) I'll go online and look for interesting covers of it. So I did that and check out this little gem i found...



O My Bloody Valentine! You're the only valentine I care about...sigh






-hayley

p.s. let's build a fort out of picnic blankets.

I know it's kind of bitchy but I...

..just want to get a telepathic signal that just automatically tells certain people



"I am NOT available for YOU."










-hayley

p.s. I want salad.

butterscotch toffeenut crumb cake with september on the side

Where did everybody go?
where did they go?
o where did they go?
where did they go?

If I met that undone conduit in your brain
I'd send my piece of mind in a paper plane

but where did they go?

It met me down here on the ground and crashed back up again
Even if it wasn't there to begin with at least we can pretend

where did they go?
where did they go?
o where did they go?
where did they go?

Shaking reason out of mind is like shaking leaves out of trees
they grow back just as fast with just as much ease

and where do they go?

Can I paint a picture that smells like cafe au lait
If I could it might be too real to not throw away

where did they go?
where did they go?
o where did they go?
where did they go?
















-hayley

p.s. i still want a superhero lunchbox.

and the world spins and comes a little bit back again

-hayley





p.s. a couple cups of nyquil don't do the trick anymore.

recycled food for thought

Has anybody else out there ever read a book that they couldn't help but think was about them? Seriously, where it gets to the point where there are so many parallels between that story and your own life that you could start to get paranoid? I'd like to know I'm not the only one out there with this issue.

When I first saw Sarah Dessen's book, Just Listen at a store in Bridgewater it was brand new. They stacked fresh, hardcover copies of it in the very front of the young adult section and I remember looking at it and thinking that I liked the cover. The funny thing is that if I first saw it in stores now I would probably scoff and walk right past it instead. But I think I was about fourteen at the time and I guess girly covers attracted me then. I even remember reading the back cover and thinking about how much I liked the description(which I would also probably scoff at now)...

Annabel Greene is the girl who has everything. At least, that's what she portrays in her modeling shoots. But Annabel's life and her older sister's eating disorder is weighing down the entire family. Isolated and ostracized at school and at home, Annabel retreats into silent acceptance. Then she meets Owen-intense, music-obsessed, and determined to always tell the truth. And with his guidance, Annabel learns to just listen to herself and gains the courage to speak honestly. But will she be able to tell everyone what really happened the night she and Sophie stopped being friends?

For reasons unbeknownst to me, I decided not to buy it that day, instead going home with something probably by Scott Westerfield. A while later I was recommended one of Dessen's earlier pieces, The Truth About Forever, bought it, read it, and liked it. After that, I came across Just Listen again at my local Borders. It was older and now being sold in the much cheaper paperback form and I finally decided to buy it.



The funny thing is that when I first read the book I didn't connect it to myself at all. There are still many things in it that If you knew me and read the book would make you probably ask what the fuck I'm talking about. Unlike Annabel, I am not a model, I don't have three sisters, I don't hate techno, blahblahbleeblah. At the time of first reading Just Listen The truth is, most of the parallels developed overtime, many of them being small but the fact that there are now so many is almost insane to me. I was probably fifteen when I first read that book and had put it on my shelf and mostly forgotten about it since, so it's only recently that I made the connections.

After an (personal) event a couple months ago, I remembered the book and immediately grabbed it off my shelf and read it for the second time. I think I was probably half scared throughout the duration of my second reading while realizing how much my own life had become like it. I decided to read it for a third time during a five hour car ride to Ocean City last week and was once again freaked out. There is this one passage on page 270 that especially irked me. I know it's dumb and lame and cliche and all that cal but it felt like Dessen had stolen my brain from saaay June, cracked it open like an egg, and slapped the yolk of it right into her story...

Just Listen, I believe, was kind of a "look-into-the-future" book for me. I can't fathom now how spooky it would have been if I knew the first time I read it that I was, in a nutshell, reading pieces of my own horoscope. I think I've grown out of most ultra-girly, young adult novels but I'm pretty sure this one is going to stick with me, whether I like it or not. And I realize now that I've probably shared way to much on the interwebbzz with people I don't know and really hate (blehhatechyu) but oh well, I don't really care, this took me a while to write...

I should probably care more





-Hayley


p.s. I need a group of yuppies to acompany me when I don't feel like being around people.

I believe in a thing called believing...

So I went into the city the other day to see Explosions in the Sky play at Ramsey Playfield's summerstage.

and It was pretty damn swell. So here's a little tidbit of the show with EITS playing "Your Hand in Mine" which is probably my favorite song of theirs.









Good music, good location, good friends-We really don't need anything else.

-Hayley

Icebreaker for the Frozen Foods Section

Entertainment for the Braindead-Run!(xiqhhyiecryn remix)


ugh, so good.








-hayley


p.s. anybody wanna stay up and tell stories with me?